BATMAN: THE REAL STORY BEGINS

(At open, there are two chairs on stage. Dick is seated in one of them. Bruce is standing and walking around.)

BRUCE: Young man, you have been living here at Wayne Manor for some time now. Although this seems like a peaceful country estate, I have an idea that is going to change our lives and the lives of thousands in nearby Gotham City. The courts have made you my ward and I think it’s time to alter our relationship. You no longer have to refer to me as “The Ward Boss.” You may call me Uncle Bruce.

DICK: (stands) Holy, name calling. That will be swell! And you can call me … Richard of Gotham!

BRUCE: I’ll call you “Dick.”

DICK: That will work, too.

BRUCE: Dick … I need to talk with you about another matter.

DICK: Is it the Internet? I got on that site completely by accident …

BRUCE: No, not that.

DICK: My cell phone?

BRUCE: No. It’s bigger than that.

DICK: Hmmmm. Bigger than a cell phone. What’s the first letter?

BRUCE: What do you know about crime?

DICK: Two things, Uncle Bruce. First … Crime does not pay. Second, I didn’t do it and I have an alibi.

BRUCE: I’m not talking about something that you have done.

DICK: Good!

BRUCE: I’m talking about the crime wave that is rolling through Gotham City. The streets are not safe for women and children and babies and pets and … and others. This evil has to stop. We must do our part.

DICK: I’ll stay in my room.

BRUCE: We must POW! And BAM! Put those criminals in a cage where they belong. I have decided to lead a campaign against those who harm others. I need some help and want you to join me.