Comedy, by Ken Bradbury, 2005

A boy and girl find a mysterious old trunk in the attic — and some even more mysterious guests in the box.

The number and gender of characters can be changed to accommodate available participants. Price is for a master script. Make as many copies as is required for your ensemble.


8 - 10 minutes

    Cast Options

  • 3 Females, 2 Males
  • 1 Female, 4 Males
  • 4 Females, 1 Male
  • 5 Males
  • 2 Females, 3 Males
  • 5 Females

Product Id: #796

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An excerpt …

(Laura thinks he’s joking)

JERRY: Hey, Laura. Can’t you take a little joke? (and we see the disheveled form of Homer slowly rise from out of the trunk. He’s a crusty old man with a mean look in his ey. Jerry’s back is also turned to the trunk) We gotta have a little fun up here don’t we? I mean ... (just then he turns and sees Homer glaring at him) Laura?!!!

LAURA: (a grunt, still turned away) What do you want?

JERRY: It’s … it’s horrible! And it’s moving!

LAURA: Very funny, Jerry. (Homer grabs Jerry by the throat)

JERRY: And it’s got me by the throat!!!!

LAURA: What kind of an idiot do you think I am?

JERRY: (still being choked as Homer drags him over to where Laura is standing) Now it’s coming for you, Laura! It’s looking right at you!

(some long-gone ancestors)

HOMER: I’m Homer! Homer McDermitt! Your great-great uncle from Killarney!

LAURA: That’s impossible! You’re dead!

HOMER: In a manner of speaking. (shouting into the box) Rosey! I found family!

LAURA: There’s somebody else in there?

HOMER: (pulling her out of the box…an old and wrinkled woman) Rosey! Me wife! Rosey, meet Jerry McDermitt, you’re long lost grandnephew!

ROSEY: (hugging Jerry violently) Praise be!

LAURA: But how can you … I mean … if you’re ….

HOMER: Lassie, we’ve been in that box for over a hundred years! I don’t suppose you’d have a wee bit of sweetbread? Or maybe a pudding?

(oops, one more occupant in the box)

HOMER: Hey dog! Come here, boy!

DOG: (jumps out of the box, panting and jumping around)

JERRY: It’s a dog!

HOMER: Of course it’s a dog you blamed fool! You think we’d leave him behind? Sit dog!

JERRY: What’s his name?

HOMER: Dog. We call him “Dog.”

LAURA: That’s it?

HOMER: I call you girl. I call him Dog. You sure you don’t have just a biscuit or maybe some sweet potato bread? Sure and I’m powerful hungry.

JERRY: This whole thing is … it’s impossible! It can’t be happening! You can’t live for over a hundred years in a box!

ROSEY: Alive? (she looks at Homer a brief moment then they both burst out in laughter)

LAURA: What’s so funny?

ROSEY: You think we’re alive? Homer, I think our relatives are a bit loony.

HOMER: (in Jerry’ face) Does this look alive to you?

JERRY: You’re dead?

ROSEY: As a rock. Been that way for … what would you say, Homer?

HOMER: 97 years this March.

DOG: (barks his correction)

HOMER: Sorry, Dog. April. It was April.


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