Comedy, by Ken Bradbury, 2005

This is a fast moving farce, a high-energy mix of 5 people at a doctor’s office.

The number and gender of characters can be changed to accommodate available participants. Price is for a master script. Make as many copies as is required for your ensemble.


8 - 10 minutes

    Cast Options

  • 3 Females, 2 Males

Product Id: #794

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An excerpt …

(it looked like a small accident)

BEASLEY: (has a broken leg) I backed into a lady with a grocery cart. 

NURSE FARQUAR: And broke your leg?

BEASLEY: I got out of the car, she chased me across the parking lot, I jumped the fence at the hardware store and landed in a display of garden tractors.

NURSE FARQUAR: And you broke your leg on a garden tractor?

BEASLEY: No. She was still after me so I jumped on a tractor, took off down the highway and pulled out in front of a UPS truck.

NURSE FARQUAR: And broke your leg?

BEASLEY: No. The truck hit a telephone pole and the pole came down on my tractor.

NURSE FARQUAR: Then you broke your leg.

BEASLEY: No. I saw it coming. I ran through five lanes of traffic with this crazy lady pushing a shopping cart right behind me so I jumped into the back of a passing pickup …

NURSE FARQUAR: And broke your leg.

BEASLEY: No. The pickup was stopped. I came running into the only building I could find … this doctor’s office. I broke my leg coming up the steps.

(the grocery-store woman …)

NURSE FARQUAR: M’am, do you have to bring the shopping cart into the office?

MRS. TORRENT: Got to. I’ve got fresh produce in here. Is the doctor in?

NURSE FARQUAR: Yes, but he’s very busy.

MRS. TORRENT: Then I’ll wait. I sprained my back jumping over a UPS truck.

BEASLEY: (sticking his head in) Is she here?


BEASLEY: (sees Mrs. Torrent) Oh, no! (he exits)

MRS. TORRENT: What was that?

NURSE FARQUAR: Uh … the doctor.

MRS. TORRENT: (getting up, painfully) Good. I’ll see him now.

NURSE FARQUAR: (jumping up and stopping her) No!

MRS. TORRENT: But he just asked for me.

NURSE FARQUAR: His wife! He was looking for his wife!

MRS. TORRENT: How can you lose a wife? Was she small?

(then it gets complicated)

MRS. MISERY: (looking out a window) Why are the police surrounding my husband’s office?


MRS. TORRENT: Thank goodness, they’re here!

NURSE FARQUAR: You called them?

MRS. TORRENT: I told them I was chasing an attempted murderer. Told ‘em I was heading this direction. (shouting off to the police as she exits) He’s around here somewhere! Draw your guns, boys! Get the dogs and the teargas!


BEASLEY: (sticking his head out) What’s going on?


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