THE ALL AMERICAN FAMILY
Comedy, by Ken Bradbury, 2003
This is a family odyssey across a few hundred years of American history. The history books don’t quite tell it this way.The number and gender of characters can be changed to accommodate available participants. Price is for a master script. Make as many copies as is required for your ensemble.
- 3 Females, 2 Males
Product Id: #777
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An excerpt …
(the family discovers America)
LOGAN: (as a native American) White man come in peace?
DAD: We come in peace, noble warrior! We want to buy land! What call thee that fair meadow?
LOGAN: Manhattan. Sell cheap. Too swampy. No like alligators in bed with papooses!
DAD: I will buy that land, noble warrior! Have beads and trinkets for trade!
LOGAN: (to an imaginary warrior behind him/her) White man sucker for anything. (to Dad) Done deal, Lucille!
(westward ho .. they come to the Grand Canyon)
DAD: I’ll back up the horses and try to jump it!
SIS: Pa! Don’t!
LOGAN: The first Europeans discovered the Canyon in 1540 as Captain Garcia Lopez de Cardenas …
BRO: We’ll never make it, Pa! It’s nearly three miles across!
DAD: We gotta get to California, Jethro! It’s the place we oughta be!
LOGAN: James Pattie was the first American to visit the Canyon in 1826 …
DAD: (whipping the horses as the wagon takes off) Hey-Ya! Come on, boys! Jump it! Jump that thing! (and the entire family screams as they go crashing to the ground)
(later, they enter the 50’s)
SIS: (turning quickly) Cool!
BRO: (turning quickly) Dig it!
MOM: (turning quickly) Groovy!
DAD: (turning) I’ve got a headache!
SIS: Great concert, Dad!
DAD: I’ve never even heard of this guy.
LOGAN: (entering, as Elvis) Thank you. Thank you very much.
SIS: (falling at his feet in adoration) Oh Elvis!!!!!
DAD: Oh, good grief! That is disgusting!
MOM: (also falling at his feet and screaming) Oh, Elvis!
DAD: Martha, get up. You’re a grown woman.
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