Comedy, by Ken Bradbury, 2002

A young man named Daniel is dropped into a den of lions and tries to talk his way out.

The number and gender of characters can be changed to accommodate available participants. Price is for a master script. Make as many copies as is required for your ensemble.


10 - 12 minutes

    Cast Options

  • 5 Males

Product Id: #772

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An excerpt …

(at first, Daniel assesses the problem)

DANIEL: Are you?

ROARY: Are we what?

DANIEL: Are you going to eat me?

ROARY: Of course we are. What a ridiculous question.

DANIEL: I’d rather you wouldn’t.

FANG: (a beat, then) No one’s ever said that before.

TAB: You’re right.

FANG: I mean we’ve had a few (screaming) Oh no! Oh help me! Help!!!! (calmly) and a couple of rather good (screams, then calmly) but we’ve never had anyone actually come out and ask.

(Then the lad wants to know why.)

ROARY: Now that’s a ridiculous question.

FANG: Then answer it.

ROARY: Uh…you answer it.

DANIEL: Are you hungry?

TAB: Not particularly.

DANIEL: Do you hate me?

FANG: We hardly know you. In fact, you seem a nice enough chap.

DANIEL: Then why do you want to eat me?

ROARY: Well … because it’s out JOB for goodness sakes! Why do birds fly? Why do kings king? It’s just what we do! We’re lions!

TAB: Well put.

FANG: Yes, quite well put. We’re lions. That settles it. Let’s get it at it. (they start toward Daniel)


(Will a little psychology help?)

DANIEL: Then act like it! Strike out on your own! Be an individual! Take a stand for independence!

FANG: If he starts singing, I may get sick.

DANIEL: How can you live with yourselves, being fed and cared for without having to hunt your own prey?

TAB: Okay. I’ll give you count of three. Take off running and we’ll make a sport of it.

ROARY: He’s got a point.


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