Comedy, by Ken Bradbury, 1996

A police sergeant tries to get the missing facts from Bo Peep ... and it doesn't go smoothly. Comedy.

Price includes 2 scripts.


8 - 10 minutes

    Cast Options

  • 1 Female, 1 Male

Product Id: #223

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An excerpt …

(A police report.)


BO-PEEP: Peep.

SERGEANT: What’s that?

BO-PEEP: Peep.  Peep.

SERGEANT: Peep-peep.

BO-PEEP: Just one little Peep.

SERGEANT: (looking up) Are you serious?  I mean, I’ve got things to do.

BO-PEEP: That’s my name.  Peep.

SERGEANT: (writing) I could have taken early retirement, but no ... I wanted to serve the public.  Is that your first or last name ... or does it even matter?

BO-PEEP: Last.  My first name is Bo.

(Missing sheep report.)

BO-PEEP: (thinks hard, then) I’m not sure.

SERGEANT: Did you ever count them?

BO-PEEP: Yeh.  But every time I tried, I fell asleep.

SERGEANT: Counting sheep.

BO-PEEP: Yeh.  Ain’t that somethin’?

SERGEANT: It certainly is.  And these sheep all belonged to you?

BO-PEEP: Except for one.  My  sister’s sheep.

SERGEANT: Your sister?

BO-PEEP: Mary.  She had a little lamb.

(A decision of justice.)

SERGEANT: (as Peep freezes in a happy pose, the Sgt. gets up and comes to the audience) Now let’s think about this a moment.  I’m ready for retirement.  I don’t need this hassle.  If I arrest this bimbo we’ll be tied up in the courts for years.  I mean, she’s got a scam running back at least a century!  On the other hand, I’m a servant of the public and I have my duty.  On the other hand, it’s just a handful of sheep.  No!  This babe’s a bonafide crook!  I’ve got to lock her up! (goes back to face Bo-Peep, who’s still frozen in time ... he looks at that stupid-looking smile) On the other hand, what’s it hurt?  What can a sheep cost?  So, somebody’s out a few bucks.  I mean, it’s not like she’s a murderer or somethin’. (comes back to the audience) On the other hand, my shift is over in twenty minutes.  They’ll never prove malicious intent.  Look at the face.  You gotta know what you’re doin’ before you can be malicious about it.


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