ONCE A QUEEN

Comedy, by Ken Bradbury, 2002

The Kingdom (Queendom in this case) is in turmoil and the only one who doesn’t know — is the queen.

The number and gender of characters can be changed to accommodate available participants. Price is for a master script. Make as many copies as is required for your ensemble.

Duration

8 - 10 minutes

    Cast Options

  • 3 Females, 2 Males
  • 1 Female, 4 Males
  • 4 Females, 1 Male
  • 5 Males
  • 2 Females, 3 Males
  • 5 Females

Product Id: #773

Price
$18.00
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An excerpt …

(once upon a time …)

OXY: Her majesty, the Queen!

QUEEN: (entering with a grand flourish) Thank you! Thank you, one and all. One people united! One nation indivisible! One …

RENFRO: Your majesty?

QUEEN: Please don’t interrupt the Queen when she’s inspiring her people.

RENFRO: Your majesty … uh … there’s no one here.

QUEEN: Really?

(doesn’t have a clue)

QUEEN: (desperately) The prime rib! Don’t tell me the stores of prime rib are running low!

RENFRO: No …

QUEEN: The wine! Renfro, if you have allowed my precious warehouse of wine to dwindle …!

RENFRO: The wine is fine, Your Grace. It’s …

QUEEN: Yes?

RENFRO: Well, it’s the people, Your Grace.

QUEEN: People?

(The people move toward the castle.)

SHOUTER: Down with the Queen! Down! Down!

QUEEN: Gown? Gown? They love my gown! (going to the balcony’s edge again) Here! Here! Look upon my gorgeous … (but just then something splats upon her chest) Dear me. What’s that? A pig dropping! There’s pig refuse on my gown! (looking up) Flying pigs? (to Oxy) Is there something you’re not telling me? Do I have flying pigs in my kingdom?

OXY: The pig wasn’t flying, Your Majesty. Someone threw it at you.

QUEEN: That’s impossible! Is this some sort of new game? Pig Pong? Whatever could they mean by this?

RENFRO: They hate you, Your Majesty.

QUEEN: Ridiculous!

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