CULTURE CLUB, THE
Humorous, by Ken Bradbury, 2000
The girls get together to try to learn how to be 'refined.'The number and gender of characters can be changed to accommodate available participants. Price is for a master script. Make as many copies as is required for your ensemble.
Duration8 - 10 minutes
- 5 Females
Product Id: #760
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An excerpt …
(The meeting will come to order.)
MONA: (entering with Jeanette) Where is everybody?
JEANETTE: How should I know? This was your idea.
MONA: It was OUR idea. All of us.
JEANETTE: It’s dumb.
MONA: Dumb ideas work sometimes.
JEANETTE: Don’t look at me when you say that.
MARIE: (entering, a young lady who thinks she’s quite sophisticated) Afternoon, darlings!
MONA & JEANETTE: (imitating her) “Afternoon, Darling!”
MARIE: Do I detect a note of … what shall I say? Sarcasm?
MONA: Have a seat, your highness. It’s time to start the meeting.
MONA: Ladies, the first meeting of the 7th-grade Culture Club will now come to order!
PETEY: Culture? I don’t need to stinkin’ culture! (they all do a slow “take” to her as she scratches herself)
MARIE: (finally) Perhaps if you first learned to spell it.
JEANETTE: It’s to get us ready for eighth-grade, Petey.
PETEY: I got my ball glove. What else you need?
MARIE: Oh … my … word.
PETEY: You want a fat lip?
(After some pointed conversation, Marie changes her mind about culture.)
JEANETTE: Wait a minute! What about the stuff you were gonna teach us?
MARIE: I really have to go.
MONA: We made a deal!
MARIE: I have an appointment.
JEANETTE: With who?
MARIE: (a long beat, then) Sarah reminded me of something. Something I should have known all along. I’ve got to go see someone. Talk to you girls later.
MONA: At least tell us who we’re bein’ stood up for.
PETEY: Who’s Bubba?
MARIE: My teddy bear. I think I need a hug. (Marie looks at her a moment, then hugs her.)
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